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Gene Nash
Gene Nash
Join Date 12/2003
+24

Does This Turkey Look Familiar?

gobble gobble

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November 22, 2005 10:06:43 PM from JoeUser ForumsJoeUser Forums

At first I couldn't see what the authors of this article had to complain about. Then I looked closer at the pictures. OMG! What a sneaky trick!

WASHINGTON, D.C.
Presidential Hall
Dwight D. Eisenhower Executive Office Building

Nov. 22, 1:11 p.m. EST

Even hardened beltway insiders were shocked speechless when President Bush turned the annual pardoning of the "National Thanksgiving Turkey" into a political stunt.

"There were children there!" said one west winger who demanded anonymity. "Everyone knew something like this was coming -- that's why the Dems have been pressing for guarantees -- but to use the children in this manner is... well... the work of an evil doer."

Bush brushed aside criticism accusing his administration of a covert conspiracy to select the pardonee, calling the pardon recipient "the people's turkey" and saying "(he) made it here through a democratic process."

A collective gasp filled the room as the pardon recipient was unveiled. One shocked woman was heard to mumble, "Isn't that?!"

President Bush quieted the room with a hard stare and insisted, "I'm going to grant a pardon this afternoon!"

"The president called him 'Marshmallow,'" sneered the anonymous insider. "But everyone here knows who that was his little nickname for. George would always smirk and laugh and say, 'Lookee there! He scoots just like a marshmallow!' This was just wrong. He did this in a way that made a mockery of our entire system."

While most Thanksgiving pardonees retire to farms, no-one was surprised to hear that today's recipient will be given privileged treatment.

"So I'm proud to announce that Scoo... um... Marshmallow and Yam," said the President, referring to the National Turkey and his designated alternate, "will serve as honorary grand marshals at Disneyland's Thanksgiving Day Parade. And they'll go on to spend the rest of their natural lives at Disneyland."

A visibly irate Senate Minority Leader Harry Reid immediately called a press conference where he foamed through clenched teeth, "Those blasted Republicans! You have to watch them every second!"


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Gene Nash
Dr Guy
Join Date 09/2004
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Reply #1 November 23, 2005 7:30:36 AM
from JoeUser ForumsJoeUser Forums
Now that is a Turkey!
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Gene Nash
Gene Nash
Join Date 12/2003
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Reply #2 November 23, 2005 1:53:48 PM
from JoeUser ForumsJoeUser Forums
Now that is a Turkey!


I'm like that little kid on the Twilight Zone who would turn you into something grotesque and zap you into the cornfield if you didn't think good thoughts.

I'm evil. I turned Scooter Libby into a turkey.

Does this mean I'm guilty of manipulating pre-pardon intelligence?
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Gene Nash
Dr Guy
Join Date 09/2004
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Reply #3 November 23, 2005 4:24:10 PM
from JoeUser ForumsJoeUser Forums

Does this mean I'm guilty of manipulating pre-pardon intelligence?

I saw that on the DNC web site. But dont you have to be convicted before you can be pardoned?  Seems Howie is still saying guilty until proven innocent!

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Gene Nash
Gene Nash
Join Date 12/2003
+24
Reply #4 November 23, 2005 9:24:58 PM
from JoeUser ForumsJoeUser Forums
I saw that on the DNC web site. But dont you have to be convicted before you can be pardoned?  Seems Howie is still saying guilty until proven innocent!


I think the Dems are trying to shame in advance, hoping to make the option look so unattractive Bush wouldn't even think of touching it.

Obviously they haven't been paying too much attention the past five years to how Bush operates. I doubt he'd care.

I would be surprised if the administration started handing out pardons, but it wouldn't be the first time this White House surprised me. Maybe a last days free-for-all ala Clinton? Then again, if it was something Bush was inclined toward doing I doubt he would worry about waiting. (See previous paragraph. )


I just thought a Turkey Libby would be funny.

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Gene Nash
Gene Nash
Join Date 12/2003
+24
Reply #5 November 23, 2005 9:38:47 PM
from JoeUser ForumsJoeUser Forums
A couple more thoughts that occurred to me after wandering away...

But dont you have to be convicted before you can be pardoned?


Nixon wasn't convicted before Ford pardoned him, was he? A preemptive presidential pardon wouldn't be unprecedented.

I think the Dems are trying to shame in advance,


Maybe they are guilty of manipulating pre-pardon intelligence!
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