A cabbie picks up a very attractive Nun.
As she gets into the cab, she notices that the cab driver is handsome, and that he keeps looking at her.
She asks him why his interest.
He replies: ‘there is something I would like to suggest, but I don’t want to offend you.’
She answers, ‘My son, you cannot offend me.
When you have been a nun as long as I have, and have seen the great variety of life that I have seen, you are not likely to be offended by anything you hear.
What was your suggestion?’
The cabbie says: ‘Very well then. I’ve always wanted to kiss a nun.’
She responds, ‘Hmmm, well let’s see what we can do about that.
But only if you are single, and you must be Catholic.’
The cab driver is very excited and says, ‘Yes, I’m single and I’m Catholic!’
‘OK’ says the nun. ‘Pull into that next alleyway there.’
The nun then fulfils his wish with a kiss which would surely make any hooker blush.
Just after they get back on the road, the cab driver starts looking very troubled.
‘My dear child,’ says the nun, ‘is something the matter?’
‘Forgive me’ says the cabbie, ‘but I’ve sinned.
I lied to you.
I must confess now that I’m married and I’m Jewish.’
‘That’s OK’ says the nun. ‘My name is Kevin and I’m going to a fancy dress party!’
A husband takes his wife to a Club.
There’s a man on the dance floor living it up: break dancing, moon walking, back flips, the lot.
Occasionally, he stops dancing to buy drinks for his friends.
It is obvious from his dress and manner that he is very wealthy.
The wife turns to her husband and says:
‘See that guy? Twenty five years ago he proposed to me and I turned him down.’
Her husband says: ‘Looks like he’s still celebrating.’